Jump to content
The Talon House

Little Johnny's Christmas


movieguy
 Share

Recommended Posts

Little Johnny's Christmas

A Little Johnny went to sit on Santa's lap, and Santa asked him what he wanted

for Christmas.

Little Johnny answered, "A damn swingset in the backyard."

"Excuse me?" said Santa.

"I want a damn swingset in my backyard," repeated Little Johnny.

Santa said, "You'll have to ask nicer if you want Santa to bring you something.

Let's try again. What else do you want?"

Little Johnny answered, "A damn sandbox for the side yard."

"You have to ask politely! One more time. What else do you want for Christmas?"

Little Johnny thought for a minute, then said, "I want a damn trampoline in

the front yard."

Santa sighed and set Little Johnny off his lap. "I'm sorry son, I can't give

anything to someone who talks like you do. I'm not bringing you anything for

Christmas."

Santa then called Johnny's parents over and told them what had happened. They

apologized profusely, saying they didn't understand why he talked like that,

and they had been trying to break him of the habit with no luck.

"I know how to stop it," Santa said. "Don't get him anything for Christmas.

Just get some dog doo. Put a pile of dog doo in the backyard where he wants the

swingset, another pile in the side yard where he wants the sandbox, and another

pile in the front yard where he wants the trampoline. That will break him of

it."

The parents agreed.

Christmas morning the kid heads downstairs to open their presents. Johnny runs

out the back door, looks around, and comes back in. He runs out the side door,

looks around, and comes back in. He runs out the front door, looks around, and

comes back in, looking upset.

"What's wrong, son?" asked his father. "What did Santa bring you?"

Little Johnny answered, "He brought me a damn dog, but I can't find him!"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
 Share

×
×
  • Create New...