TalonRider Posted January 4, 2005 Report Posted January 4, 2005 Crack Found on Governor's Daughter [imagine that!] Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says [no, really?] Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers [now that's taking things a bit far!] Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus? [not if I wipe thoroughly!] Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over [what a guy!] Miners Refuse to Work after Death [no-good-for-nothin' lazy so-and-sos!] Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant [see if that works any better than a fair trial!] War Dims Hope for Peace If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile [you think?!] Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures [who would have thought!] Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide [they may be on to something!] Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges [you mean there's something stronger than duct tape?!] Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge [he probably IS the battery charge!] New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group [weren't they fat enough?!] Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft [That's what he gets for eating those beans!] Kids Make Nutritious Snacks [Kids taste like chicken?] Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half [Chainsaw Massacre all over again!] Hospitals are Sued by Seven Foot Doctors [boy, are they tall!] And the winner is.... Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead (Can you believe it?) Quote
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