Signs You're Probably A Blue-Neck

[movieguy]

Signs You're Probably A Blue-Neck

* You think barbecue is a verb meaning, "to cook outside."

* You think Heinz Ketchup is really SPICY!

* You don't have any problems pronouncing "Worcestershire sauce" correctly.

* For breakfast, you would prefer potato au gratin to grits.

* You don't know what a moon pie is.

* You've never had an RC Cola.

* You've never, ever, eaten okra, fried or boiled.

* You eat fried chicken with a knife and fork.

* You've never seen a live chicken, and the only cows you've seen are on road trips.

* You have no idea what a polecat is.

* You don't see anything wrong with putting a sweater on a poodle.

* You don't have bangs.

* You would rather vacation at Martha's Vineyard than Six Flags.

* More than two generations of your family have been kicked out of the same prep school in Connecticut .

* You would rather have your son become a lawyer than grow up to get his own TV fishing show.

* Instead of referring to two or more people as "y'all," you call them "you guys," even if both of them are women.

* You don't think Ted Kennedy has an accent.

* You have never planned your summer vacation around a gun-and-knife show.

* You think more money should go to important scientific research at your university than to pay the salary of the head football coach.

* You don't have at least one can of WD-40 somewhere around the house.

* The last time you smiled was when you prevented someone from getting on an on ramp to the highway.

* You don't have any hats in your closet that advertise feed stores.

* The farthest south you've ever been is the perfume counter at Neiman Marcus.

* You refer to binoculars as opera glasses.

* You can't spit out of the car window without pulling over to the side of the road and stopping.

* You would never wear pink or an applique sweatshirt.

* You don't know what an applique is.

* You don't know anyone with at least two first names (e.g. Joe Bob, Faye Ellen, Billy Ray, Mary Jo, Bubba Dean, Joe Dan, Mary Alice, etc.).

* You don't have doilies, and you certainly don't know how to make one.

* You get freaked out when people on the subway talk to you.

* You can do your laundry without quarters.

* None of your fur coats are homemade.