movieguy Posted July 31, 2004 Report Posted July 31, 2004 Stages of Life MALE AGE DRINK 17 Beer 25 Beer 35 Vodka 48 Double Vodka 66 Maalox AGE SEDUCTION LINE 17 My parents are away for the weekend. 25 My girlfriend is away for the weekend. 35 My fiancee is away for the weekend. 48 My wife is away for the weekend. 66 My second wife is dead. AGE FAVORITE SPORT 17 Sex 25 Sex 35 Sex 48 Sex 66 Napping AGE DRUG 17 Pot 25 Coke 35 Really Good Coke 48 Power 66 Coke, a Limousine, the Company Jet AGE A SUCCESSFUL DATE 17 Tongue 25 Breakfast 35 She didn't set back my therapy. 48 I didn't have to meet her kids. 66 Got home alive. AGE FAVORITE FANTASY 17 Getting to Third 25 Airplane Sex 35 Menage a trois 48 Taking the Company Public 66 Swiss Maid/Nazi Love Slave AGE HOUSE PET 17 Roaches 25 Stoned-out College Roommate 35 Black Lab 48 Children from his first Marriage 66 Barbi AGE THE IDEAL AGE TO GET MARRIED? 17 25 25 35 35 48 48 66 66 17 AGE IDEAL DATE 17 Triple Stephen King feature at Drive-in. 25 Split the check and go back to my place. 35 Just come over. 48 Just come over and cook. 66 Sex in the Jet on the way to Vegas. Female AGE DRINK 17 Wine Coolers 25 Wine Coolers 35 Red Wine 48 Dom Perignon 66 Shot of Jack with Ensure AGE EXCUSES FOR REFUSING DATES 17 Need to wash my hair. 25 Need to wash and condition my hair. 35 Need to color my hair. 48 Need to have Francois color my hair. 66 Need to have Francois color my wig. AGE FAVORITE SPORT 17 Shopping. 25 Shopping. 35 Shopping. 48 Shopping. 66 Shopping. AGE DRUG 17 Shopping. 25 Shopping. 35 Shopping. 48 Shopping. 66 Shopping. AGE A SUCCESSFUL DATE 17 Burger King 25 Free Meal 35 A Diamond 48 A Bigger Diamond 66 Home Alone AGE FAVORITE FANTASY 17 Tall, Dark and Handsome 25 Tall, Dark and Handsome with Money 35 Tall, Dark and Handsome, Money and Brains 48 A Man with Hair 66 A Man AGE HOUSE PET 17 Muffy the Cat 25 Unemployed Boyfriend and Muffy 35 Irish Setter and Muffy 48 His Children and Muffy 66 Retired Husband stuffs Muffy AGE THE IDEAL AGE TO GET MARRIED? 17 17 25 25 35 35 48 48 66 66 AGE IDEAL DATE 17 He Offers to Pay. 25 He Pays. 35 He cooks Breakfast the next morning. 48 He cooks Breakfast for the Kids. 66 He can chew Breakfast. Quote
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