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Christians and light bulbs


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Christians and light bulbs

How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Charismatic: Only 1

Hands already in the air.

Pentecostal: 10

One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of


Presbyterians: None

Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Roman Catholic: None

Candles only.

Baptists: At least 15.

One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the

change and

decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.

Episcopalians: 3

One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk

about how

much better he old one was.

Mormons: 5

One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.

Unitarians: ?

We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the

need for a

light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that

light bulbs

work for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or

compose a modern

dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we


explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent,


3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to


Methodists: Undetermined.

Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are

loved. You can be

a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Church-wide lighting

service is

planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.

Nazarene: 6

One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting


Lutherans: None

Lutherans don't believe in change.


What's a light bulb?

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