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The Talon House

Dating Doublespeak


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Things you might hear from a date at the end of the evening when they know they're not planning on ever seeing you again.


* "Good luck with..."

* "I'll call you."

* "Hey, keep in touch!"

* "What was your roommates name again?"

* "My psychic thinks I shouldn't be in a relationship right now."

* "Now you take care!"

* "Um... it's been real."

* "I'll see you around."

* "Bye !"

* "Okay.... later"

* "I hope you find what you're looking for."

* "Gee, I think I'm going to be busy for the entire summer."

* "Is your friend single?"

* "Oooh, will you look at the time?"

* "I'm just going to the corner store for some cigarettes."

* "It's not you, it's me."

* "It's not me, it's you."

* "You know... our star signs don't match."

* "Let's just be friends."

* Things you don't want to hear on a first dinner date:

* "Don't worry, babe. Moustache wax isn't toxic if you swallow it."

* "Are you gonna eat that whole steak?"

* "Whoa! Easy on the dessert!"

* "Oops! I can't believe I left my wallet/purse/money at home. again."

* "Shix drinkz sin't drunkk. iiii kin still drrrive."

* "Why don't we skip dinner and just head off to your place for a quickie? ...because I've got another date in an hour."

* Things you should never say in the heat of the moment:

* "I'd like to have an open relationship."

* "Have you started yet?"

* "Could you hurry up? My favorite show is on soon."

* "Hmm, I just remembered. I'm out of milk and cereal."

* "You think your sister would be interested in a three-way?"

* "Oooh, Steven" (your name is Sean)

* "This is my first time." (she says as she pulls out a whip)

- by Brenda Ross

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